Anger is a natural human emotion that we all experience. Anger spreads like a wild fire and when it’s not contained we find ourselves in situations that we prefer to avoid. Sometimes our anger can get to the point of affecting our health, employment, and relationships. Here are some strategies to help you with reducing and containing your anger.
1. Understanding your Anger
The first step to managing your anger is to understand it. Many times we view anger as a negative emotion, however it’s a very natural feeling everyone experiences.
Anger tends to be heavily associated with aggression, which gives it the negative stigma. It’s okay to feel angry toward others, aggression… not so much. Unless you’re engaging in a sport or something of the sort, physical aggression will most likely leave you in a troubled situation.
When you separate anger from aggression, it’s much easier to turn to healthier alternatives for dealing with anger.
2. Finding Healthy Outlets
In our society, it’s much more acceptable to show rage than it is to show tears. Typically, men view aggression as the only outlet for handling anger because we were not taught how to appropriately express our emotions.
Because we were not taught alternative ways for dealing with our anger, aggression typically becomes to the “go to” solution. Everyone’s healthy outlet for reducing their anger is going to be different. This is where self awareness and mindfulness become very helpful. Finding what works for for you is going to be the key to managing your anger.
Here is a Small List of Healthy Outlets:
- Going for a bike ride
- Playing an instrument
- Venting to a friend
- Writing
- Engaging in an art activity
- Reading
- Listening to music
- Watch your favorite Netflix series (but not too much!)
3. Mindfulness
One of the most strategies for dealing with anger is to become more mindful and self-aware. Mindfulness is being in a state of awareness where you are full conscious of your thoughts and feelings.
When you are living in a mindfulness state you living in the present moment as opposed to stressing about the past or future. Some may notice a change in their behavior through mindfulness practices immediately, however for most it’s a lifestyle change.
Here are a few mindfulness tips:
- Deep Breathing
- Meditation
- Observing your thoughts
- Social media & electronic breaks
- Yoga
- Prayer
- Therapy & Counseling
- Writing
4. Exercising
Research has proven over and over that exercise reduces your cortisol levels. Cortisol is the stress hormone that your body naturally produces. If your stress levels are constantly elevated it becomes more difficult to regulate your emotions.
Have you ever heard of the phrase, “blow off some steam”? Exercising can be an extremely helpful way to contain your feelings of anger and keep you from blowing off steam in the wrong direction.
5. Self Awareness
One of the quickest ways to address your anger is by identifying it. Many times we think we are feeling angry when we are really experiencing another similar emotion. Expanding our feelings vocabulary increases our self awareness and ability to distinguish our anger from other emotions.
Here is a list of similar emotions you may actually be feelings:
- Frustration
- Betrayed
- Disappointed
- Hurt
- Rejected
- Jealous
6. Look Beyond the Surface
If you notice that you’re constantly feeling angry but you’re not quite sure why, there is typically a deeper issue that has not been addressed. Anger tends to much more of a surface emotion. Underneath anger is usually much deeper feelings like shame, guilt, loneliness, or insecurity. Whenever you experience anger ask yourself, “Is there a deeper emotion beyond the surface of this anger?” When you’re you’re able to identify, address, and heal from the deeper emotions anger will naturally subside.
7. Let It Go
There’s a reason it’s called anger management and not anger elimination. You can’t completely rid yourself of being angry. Actually, being angry in some situations can be positive when appropriately expressed. Many times we try to fight our anger but it seems like more you fight your anger the less control you actually have over it. Sometimes the key to managing your anger is to simply let it go. Anger does not need to be an something to fear. Anger is a natural emotion that comes and goes like the weather, just as soon as it arrived it will surely pass.