Fresno Family Therapy Blog
The Sting of Retroactive Jealousy and What to Do About It
Retroactive Jealousy, often referred to as “RJ” to those who experience it, involves having an unhealthy fixation on the way that their partner lived their life before meeting them. It can involve thinking about the people our partner has spent...
How to Handle Holiday Conflict Through the Lens of Validation
Stress and conflict with our partners can feel ten times larger this time of year. Maybe you don’t like how much money your partner devotes to buying your family presents; maybe we don’t like your Uncle Ted who always wants to give us a kiss each...
How Adding More Thankfulness Can Improve Your Emotional Wellness & Relationships This Holiday Season
The month of November is filled with the season changing, the leaves turning, even the darkness coming sooner than before, and holidays beginning. It’s colder outside; we are wearing warmer clothes; and we are often around family for more reasons...
Four Ways the “Victim Mentality” Affects Us and How to Turn it Around
The term “Victim Mentality” is all over social media right now and before I get way in too deep, please let me take a moment to be clear that there is a huge difference between being a victim and having a Victim Mentality. While TikTok, Insta,...
How to Talk to our Kids about the 3-D’s: Death, Divorce, and Disease
In my 14 years of working as a clinician (Wow! I’m really aging myself!), I have worked with many children and the truth is that I have children myself, but one of the things I have learned is that some topics are more difficult to talk about with...
Back to School… Back to School.
Back to School Can Be Overwhelming We are at the end of August and school is in full swing events are planned, and sports have started! Which also means that you’re more than likely overbooked with pick-ups, drop-offs, practice, games, performances...
Four Ways Depression Changes You as Told Through the Eyes of Eeyore
I am reminded of my favorite nursery tale of Winnie the Pooh, which was written by A.A. Milne in 1926. While there have been many adaptations of this story over the years, such as by Disney in 1966 or even more recently by Disney in 2007, Disney...
Journaling Your Journey: The Importance of Using Writing to Calm Your Complicated Emotions
Mourning can be a long and lonely journey but through the art of journaling, one can express their truest emotions and biggest fears. Journaling can be a way to cope with the loss of something you never imagined in ways that utilizes many of your...
Grief and Depression: Learn These Strategies to Understand and Manage Grief Triggers
Fyodor Dostoyevsky once said, “The mystery of human existence lies not in just staying alive, but in finding something to live for.” When we experience a loss (either a person, place, thing, or ourselves), it can feel very daunting. It can feel...
April Showers Bring May Flowers but Not Very Quickly in Grief
Traditionally, April is a time of wind, rain, and chill; however, like many other hard times, we must look to the silver lining because just a few days later May is when Earth’s flowers begin to bloom and take growth. When we think of this...
Four Ways of Handling Grief this Easter Holiday
After losing a loved one, holidays are often not as simple as fireworks for the Fourth of July; Apple Cider Toasts to ring in the New Year’s; Christmas lights for Christmas; or feasts on Thanksgiving. Holidays can also be a reminder of what we...
Begin Healing Your Relationship by Asking Your Partner These 6 Questions
Couples come to therapy because there is healing that needs to take place within their relationship. Often these couples are not aware of where it went wrong. In previous posts I’ve shared how to re-build intimacy, learning your communication...
Happy Holidays: How to Survive this Holiday Season as a Couple
How many times have you had to split the holidays between both sides of the family? Often we run around between houses; we visit aunt Lillys house but have to leave by 3 o’clock if we want to make it grandpa Chucks by 4 o'clock. Often leaving us...
Building a Community of Support through Nurturing Relationships and Celebrating Traditions
There are several keys to keeping relationships alive and vibrant. One such key is to invest into those relationships with one’s intimate partner, one’s family, and one’s friends. Small but consistent investments can help build connection into a...
Children, Back to School, Routines OH MY!
Hello August! Here we are getting ready to start school! Some of our children have either already started or are getting ready to start school. If you have toddlers this can mean Pre-school, TK also known as Transitional Kindergarten or...
Effective and Loving Approaches for Reducing Children’s Tantrums
I began my journey working with children while I was still an intern. I moved into working with babies (ages 0-5) shortly after. One supervisor I had shared with me that while working with the parents of these children it’s important to share with...
Valentine’s Day: How to Respark and Keep the Love in Your Relationship
How to Stay in Love With Valentines quickly approaching its natural to be come excited for what the day might bring whether its a special date night out or gifts you may be giving or receiving. Its exciting to think about how well your partner...
Implement this Five-Minute Marriage Habit this Valentine’s Day
When working with couples 9 out of 10 times they are wanting to work on their communication and wanting to reconnect. They tend to feel that their marriage is not working, or they are exploring divorce. Often these couples have forgotten how to...
Defusing Holiday Season Conversations: Strategies for Effective Communication and Remaining Calm
The holidays can be a time for warmth, family, joy, traditions, cheer, laughter, giving thanks, and so much more. For some, the holidays can also be a time for stress, anger, anxiety, grief, frustration, sadness, interacting with people that do not...
Four Communication Styles and How They Improve or Hurt Your Relationship
How is communication explained? When we look at a common definition it says exchanging of information. However, it does not describe how we should communicate as well as what are ways to communicate. There are 4 main communication styles:...
Five Strategies from a Therapist for When You are Experiencing Gaslighting
What is Gaslighting? It is a psychological manipulation, which can make the recipient of this feel as though their feelings, instincts, and even sanity are up for question. The goal of this to gain power and control over the other person. Now we...
Trauma Response: The Four Types of Responses and Tips for Managing Them
During my time as a therapist people often use the phrase “I know it's just a trauma response.” Without knowing what a trauma response is. Trauma is different for everyone. What is traumatic for you may not be traumatic for your best friend,...
Four Ways to Reduce Anxiety Related to COVID-19
Coronavirus, COVID-19, shelter-in-place, pandemic, social distancing, these are all terms you’ve likely heard very often throughout the past weeks. I’m sure you’re exhausted from all of the coronavirus conversation and may be even feeling anxious....
How Engaging In This One Behavior Is Preventing You From Happiness
In a culture of hyper-competiveness and hyper-comparison it is easy to get caught up in judging ourselves in comparison to others. When comparing yourself to others you are almost always guaranteed to come out feeling negative. If you...
7 Strategies for Dealing With Anger
Anger is a natural human emotion that we all experience. Anger spreads like a wild fire and when it’s not contained we find ourselves in situations that we prefer to avoid. Sometimes our anger can get to the point of affecting our health,...
